The Taylor Swift Story...

Taylor Swift is a new country singer (she sings that Tim McGraw song). She is only 17 years old, but very talented. Anyway, my brother-in-law got tickets to take my sister to see her perform, but she ended up having to work. Their 8 year old (my nephew) loves her, so he took him instead. On the way to the concert they were in a HORRIBLE car accident. While they were waiting for the ambulance to come my nephew asked if they were still going to see Taylor Swift and when he heard they couldn't he was absolutely crushed. So after all was said and done my brother-in-law sent an email to her fan-site (or something like that) with the whole story and pictures of the van and asked if she would send him an autograph. Taylor Swift actually called him on the phone to talk to him and then offered him free tickets to a show she was giving in a nearby town. He was so excited because she told him she would let him go inside the tour-bus and backstage. I haven't had a chance to talk to him yet, but I'm guessing it was an experience he won't soon forget. So I am now officially a die-hard Taylor Swift fan, because there aren't a lot of "stars" out there who would have actually called him to thank him for being their fan. Its nice to know that unlike some people (cough, brittany spears, cough) success hasn't gone to her head. (Or shaved her head, either...)

I want a vacation...

I have decided that I want to go on vacation with my husband. Let me define "vacation" for you. I want to go somewhere where a wake-up call does not involve poopy diapers. I want to fall asleep on my husbands chest and not wake up face to face with a child. I want to spend a few days not having to use the phrases, "stop fighting with your brother", "Watch where your peeing!" and "WHAT THE HECK IS THAT SMELL???". I want to go somewhere where dressing for dinner does not mean trying to force your two-year-old to wear pants at the table. I want after-dinner entertainment to involve more than a rousing game of "what made that spot on the carpet?". I want to be able to kiss my husband passionately without hearing my five-year-old gag. I want to spontaneously get "friendly" without having to check the closet first to make sure no one is using it for hide-and-seek. I want the phrase, "get back in that bed" to have an entirely different meaning. But mostly I just want a few days where someone else cooks my meals, makes my bed, does the dishes and scrubs the toilet without complaint. Does anyone know of a resort that can provide all that with no notice and very little cost to me???

The Lotion Episode...

Z went into our room and took the cap off a lotion bottle and then methodically squeezed a ton of lotion all over the lid. When we found the mess we did the typical parent thing and confronted him with it. Chris pointed at it and said "What is this?!?!" and Z quite calmly told him, "It's a birthday cake!" We reminded him not to do it again, but didn't really punish him 'cause that was just too cute.

Every Flavor Beans...

My grandmother LOVES those Jelly-Belly jelly beans that come in the compartmentalized box so each flavor has its own space. The other day at Borders I found a box of "Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans" from Harry Potter in box just like the Jelly-Belly ones. So, do you think it would be a good idea to pick her up a box for her birthday this year or not? I mean the every flavor beans come with booger flavor and sardine flavor and vomit flavor and grass flavor and so on and so forth. I'm just wondering if she isn't a little tired of the same old flavors we send every year. This would defiantly spice things up, so to speak.

My Heron...

I jog on a walking path that runs along the open canal behind our home. The canal is filled with ducks and fish and a great big heron. I love that bird, it is really beautiful, but it is also HUGE! It is also usually timid and maintains at least a 5-7 foot distance between itself and people. I say usually because tonight while I was jogging that stupid bird was sitting in the middle of the path and WOULD NOT MOVE! I know it is silly, but I was afraid to go around it because it is really big and I don't want something that big, with that long of a beak anywhere near me. So, instead, I made a complete jerk of myself yelling at it, stomping at it and waving my arms at it. It just stood there and looked at me until I finally moved as far to the right of it as I could and sprinted past. When I looked back it was still just standing there, so I am, apparently, not that threatening. All I know is that I didn't want to be known as the first woman to die of a heron attack.

Confusing Conversation...

We went to Sweet Tomatoes for lunch today. (It is a huge salad bar and soup place and one of our favorites.) While I was in line to get soup the lady in front of me asked if I had tried the chili, which has ground beef in it. I casually told her no and that I was a vegetarian and she looked at me and said, "It's low-fat you know," in this sarcastic voice. What?!?!? I don't not eat meat to lose weight, it's just a personal choice and it isn't like I said she was a bad person for eating meat (what do I care if other people eat meat?). Was she just mad that I wouldn't try the chili? I am just so confused...

What!?!?!...

Z just walked up to me, pointed at his shorts and said, "Look mommy. I'm wearing pants." before wandering off to play again. Seriously, what was his point???

Fortune Cookies...

I had one the other day and the fortune seriously said, "Your creative ideas will reap many rewards." As opposed to my dumb ideas that lead to catastrophe??? Who writes these things? Please tell me that someone does not actually get paid for that!?!?! So I have decided to write my own fortunes. Here are a few I would like to find in my cookie. (Feel free to play along!)

1. Wow! You look great! Have you lost weight?

2. Bring this fortune with you next time and enjoy complimentary child-care while you and your husband enjoy a quiet meal together.

3. By reading this fortune you will no longer need to count the calories you consumed at this meal!

And my personal favorite...

4. PHEW! I was starting to think I would be trapped in that cookie forever.

(I know, I crack me up, too :P)

My Pregnant Menards Story...

Okay, I am telling this only because so many people have requested it (okay, one person), not because I still have a personal vendetta against Menards. When I was 2 months pregnant (my first pregnancy) I was sent on an errand to Menards to buy cedar mulch for my parents garden. I went to Menards where three different people sent me to three different places before finally telling me that all I had to do was pay for it and then drive around to the lumber yard. (If you have never been to the lumber yard section I would recommend avoiding it at all costs.) So anyway, I pay for the mulch and drive around to the lumber yard where I am informed that they did not give me the right paperwork so I had to go back inside to customer service. They corrected the problem, blew off my complaints and sent me back to the lumberyard. I drive back around to the lumber yard, pass "inspection" and am sent way to the back to pick up the mulch. When I get there I find some employee to tell me where I get the mulch. He looks at my paperwork then tells me that I can't take anything until I go back to the inspection point and pick up a yellow pick up slip. So I drive back to the "inspector", chew him out and head back to the mulch area. A different employee looks at my yellow slip, points to the mulch and then magically disappears! It takes me 10 minutes to find another stupid employee to load the 100+ pound bags into my car (and they were not very nice about it, even after I told them I was in the family way!). Then I drive back to the inspection point to leave and the same moron who sent me in without a yellow slip says I can't leave without a blue slip. At this point in time I told him where to...well, anyway...I told him that two different people had "helped" me and that neither of them had offered me a blue slip. When he told me that I would have to drive back in and get one I decided I had had it. So I parked my station wagon in the middle of the exit door and rolled the window up until he finally had some other flunky bring up a blue slip so I could leave. I mean, come on! Why on earth would a woman who cannot even lift the bag of mulch steal them?!?!?! After that experience I am a hard-core Home Depot fan...

Movie Time...

The boys are watching "The Pebble and the Penguin". It is either exceptionally good or they are really, really tired because they are both sitting on the couch with their hands down their pants. (WHY DO BOYS DO THAT?!?!?!)

Frosted Flakes...

The boys just got into a "frosted flakes" fight. I walked into the kitchen to discover them wrestling over the cereal box (which is torn to shreds) and there is cereal EVERYWHERE!! I stopped them and told them to start cleaning it up and they proceeded to sit in the middle of the floor eating as much of the cereal as they could as fast as they could. So now, instead of cleaning it up, they are sitting in time-out in seperate rooms both yelling at the top of their lungs, "HE STARTED IT!" (And instead of cleaning it up I am blogging about it...go figure.)

Proper Grammer...

What M said about cutting his knuckle today:

"I hate bleedy. No, I hate blooding. No, I hate bleeded. Wait, that's not right. Forget it. I just hate blood on me!"

YEAH...

It worked!!! So, quick update. If anyone knows a cure for transformer-itis we need 3 antidotes and quickly! I turned 30 without too many "you're getting old" jokes. I will be done with daycare next week and, while I thought that I would be relieved to have a break, I am actually feeling a little sad at the thought of not seeing my nephew regularly every week. (Not to mention my brother and darling sister-in-law!) We have a new nephew, Nathan, who arrived on April 12th. My neighbor had a baby, also (Quinton). So now I have baby-itis, but I am trying to lose more weight before the next one. (I am down 45 pounds, yeah for me!) I started "training" for the half-marathon coming up in January. (I am pretty much just continuing to run the six miles a day that I usually do, but I am planning to gradually add more.) Today is my husband's birthday, so I am making him a pie. Oh, yes, and when I ran my dishwasher today I smelled this funky smell. I turned it off and opened it and all this smoke came out of it. Now my house smells like burnt rubber and pumpkin pie. Hopefully maintenance will be here soon.

Please, Please Work...

For some reason blogspot won't let me post anything! It got so frustrating that I just gave up trying for awhile. Hopefully this will post and life will be happy again...